With the US Presidential elections just a few weeks away, newspaper editors have got a brand new bogeyman - Donald Trump.
But a lot of people are actually believing the hype and the scare stories. They think Donald might actually become President.
Well... Relax! It's not going to happen.
Tinkering around on Google Maps, I put in the city of Dubai. I wasn't sure if Dubai was in Saudi or the UAE.
By happy chance, my Google settings were on pedestrian mode - so along with telling me that Dubai was in the UAE, I was also informed that it was 4,702 miles away - and that it would take me 59 days, 21 hours to walk there.
Most astonishing was the sheer level of detail. All the way through the Balkans, Turkey and Syria, Google is giving you directions right down to the nearest foot!
I then set out to see if Google had any 10,000-mile walking tours. And they do! To Sulawesi in Indonesia.
I'm now trying to tap them up for some sponsorship! Come on Google! Give me some money!
(If you are Alex Lewczuk, then just hover your mouse over the previous par and it will give you the link!)
I'm not a great runner - but I can take one hell of a beating.
For the past 20 years, I have balove een relatively injury-free. A few blisters - no avoiding those. Few problems with tight ankles. But not too much to get worked up about.
Anyway: I am cockily putting my head on the block. Because I reckon I've got... THE ANSWER! The golden secret to injury-free running!
Could this be the Holy Grail for long-distance runners???
Well... It. Just. Might! (I am aware that this may ever so slightly be tempting fate... But not to worry! I'll keep you posted from the hospital bed!)
(If your name happens to be Alex Lewczuk - Hello Alex! If you want to open the link, then you have to hover your cursor over the previous par!)
Over the last month, I've been doing a lot of soul-searching - to find the person who is, basicallyl, The Most Awful Brit Alive.
A whole heap of contenders.
But there's one stand-out winner.
And I've also got a brilliant idea for what you ought to do when you meet this loathsome piece of humanity.
My latest whirl in Huffington... (If you're Alex Lewczuk, then the link is embedded in the previous sentence! Click on the link and you're there! X)
For the first time in recorded history, I have come to the defence of one of our most senior Royals - HRH Prince Billy.
William has been taken to task this past week for being an idle slacker. He's only done 100 hours this week, and because he's getting the Royal Dole, the shiftless bastard should be turning out for lots and lots of Royal Duties. Which means small-talking with people, planting trees and unveiling plaques.
Well excuse me for saying so... but these Royal Duties are an utter, utter waste of time. William hates them. Most of the Royals hate them. And my ask guess - that the bulk of the British population could not care less if Prince William turns out to the local unveiling. Send in the local mayor or some other worthy dignitary! It doesn't matter one jot who opens these fetes and hospitals and shopping malls.
Here are my latest thoughts in Huffington: (If your name is Alex Lewczuk then this is what you have to do! You have to click on the link! It is embedded in the first sentence of this paragraph!)
So as of this month, Lucky Lord Lucan is now totally, utterly and 100 per cent officially DEAD - as dead, even, as Monty Python's dead parrot.
Lucan's son George can now rightfully call himself the 8th Earl of Lucan, George's pretty Danish heiress wife can call herself a Countess, and any kids that they are lucky enough to have will all be little Lord and Ladies in their own right.
Well... sorry to piss on the chips, but the only evidence that Lord Lucan is actually dead is that no-one's seen the old blighter for the last 41 years.
Here's my take on it for Huffington. http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/bill-coles/lord-lucan-title_b_9149150.html
Over the last four decades, there have been many, many weird stories about what might have happened to Lucky Lord Lucan - but one of the strangest by far is that he John Aspinall fed him to his pet tiger.
This story is now right back in the news - one of the Earl's old pals heard it all from a friend. Who's now dead. (All the key witnesses in the Lord Lucan story are invariably dead.)
Still - it's a cracking story. Just as good now as when I first heard it 20 years ago.
Here's my take on it for Huffington. http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/bill-coles/lord-lucan_b_9130406.html